Random song? I think not.

Darius Rucker's song 'Learn to live' I don't know why but it really hits home for me...
I was driving in the "truck" (Really the SUV) I did that old favorite game of mine where I ask a question to the I pod or my Zune which ever one I am currently listening to.

I asked, "What am I doing wrong in my life?"

I got this as an answer, Learn to Live. I know what most people would say that is just a silly thing it's not true and you shouldn't trust things like that. Well... I guess I am just that silly person that dances in the car to a life changing song that I found of shuffle.

I never said I was a conventional person at finding out who I am...

Here are the lyrics....

Grandpa Campbell would sit upon his front porch
And I'd be right there, just sitting on his knee
He'd tell stories of love and feast and famine
And I'd hang on to every word that he would breathe
He'd said boy as you walk through this life
Here's a little wisdom that'll help you get by

You gotta live and learn
You gotta crash and burn
You gotta make some stances
And take some chances
You gotta live and love
And take all life has to give
You gotta live and learn
So you can learn to live

Well, I left home and I went to Carolina
I then set off just to see what I could see
I did some things that I wasn't really proud of
Sometimes life just got the best of me
But I'd always think back to those days
And I know what Grandpa Campbell would say
He'd say

You gotta live and learn
You gotta crash and burn
You gotta make some stances
And take some chances
You gotta live and love
And take all life has to give
You gotta live and learn
So you can learn to live

After years of runnin' round and searchin'
I found me a woman who loves me just for me
All those mistakes I thought that I was makin'
Led me right here to you sittin' on my knee
Son, as you walk through this life
Here's a little wisdom that'll help you get by

You gotta live and learn
You gotta crash and burn
You gotta make some stances
You gotta take some chances
You gotta live and love
And take all life has to give
You gotta live and learn
You gotta live and learn
So you can learn to live
Learn to live


So the song isn't my life it's his. That's not the point. It's not a Taylor Swift song where she writes for girls her age and younger.

Just some of the lyrics that really popped out at me...

You gotta make some stances
And take some chances

All those mistakes I thought that I was makin'
Led me right here to you sittin' on my knee

Lately I have been thinking about motherhood. Would I make a good mom? I had to think really hard about that one. I know that some people know right away that they will be. Or some with the opposite answers... After I heard that song... It made me realize I cam be a good mom. I can do it. With every single thing that I have put myself in and gotten myself out of. Or didn't put myself in but got myself out of... I can help my kids not make those mistakes. I know... My kids will make mistakes and get hurt.

I want to be the kind of mom my mom is. That no matter what it is or what has happened that she always had a band aid ready for me. I know that she doesn't know everything, and if she does she wont tell me because she doesn't want to see the pain go across my face again as I remember what has happened to me.

I don't know... I guess the song was a good pick me up on a gloomy day...

I just want to be a better person.

Christin


Over and Out.

Updation

The Drive-in theater:Kyle and I went to the drive in theater!!! How awesome is that?! We weren't sure it was going to be as good as it was. but the place we went was SO nice and really really cheap. Sound was awesome. and the people who worked there were really friendly. Guess we found out new place to go every Friday. That is honestly all we do... Watch movies. The dilemma of not drinking and living in a military town.

The way I dress: Well I never thought that I dressed horrible but I knew I didn't dress AS NICE. Well I have a lot of t shirts and jeans. So now I have to go and buy nicer shirts and all that jazz. Kyle doesn't like it. He thinks I have to many shoes and to many clothes. really I have two new pairs of flats that are the nice dress shoes I have. I only have one pair of heels. Also Most of my shirts are the actual shirts that I have gotten from traveling around.

New hobbies: I have picked up painting out of all things. I really enjoy actually. I think it is a blast. It takes you to really think. I picked it up quickly and am hoping to paint on more than just paper and what not. Thinking about finding an older dresser and refinishing it. Paint it and give it new nobs and stuff. I think it would be fun.

Finally decided what to do with my life: I finally decided on what I want to do with my life. I know I know that everyone has always made fun of me because I couldn't really decided. For a long time I have talked about becoming a chemical engineer. I am good at it. I know that I can do it. I could possibly do some good with that, but! I don't ever think that I could go day to day doing that job. I can bring happiness into someone's life with... waif for it... BAKED GOODS!!! :] I have actually picked up baking quite fast. I believe that I could do it and do a great job of it! So, Kyle and I have been talking and are looking at schooling things for me. I will need to go to school to get some business classes and management classes. I also need to get into baking/cooking school. :] I really really really like doing this. I feel really really really positive about this. I am really excited for it. I think I could be awesome at it. I mean I bake here all the time, and it's good! I CAN do this!!!! I CAN!


Over and Out

Christin

Being underestimated....

I am SICK and TIRED of being underestimated. Under appreciated and annoyed to all get out!

Really I hate how just because I am quiet, unassuming, and just don't feel like talking to stupid people...

I know that I am young hooray! I know my braces make me look like I am even younger. I know that being married at my age isn't advised! Thank you for point that out!!! I am sorry to tell you this, but i am quite smart. I know how to do several things that some will only dream about.

So just because I don't get smashed at your beer fest parties and grind up on your husbands doesn't make me stupid or a loser! It makes me have morals and values.

Not every quiet person has horrible mental problems. It just means that I don't find wasting my time on you.

It is nothing against those who have not had the chance to talk to someone like me but!!!!! those who have!! you annoy me.

I hate some Army wives. I will admit it. I don't feel bad about it. Though they may have hated me before I started hating them, I am not ashamed of it.


Christin